A lot of people are shocked when I tell them how many men I’ve dated in the last couple of years, but if you really know me, then you know that whenever I set a goal in life or love, I go hard. I think it’s a quality a lot of people lack when it comes to dating; taking dating as seriously as they do their other life aspirations, specifically their career. If we spent even half the energy we put towards our careers into building a relationship, we would all be so much more successful at love.
Here are a few ways you may deal with our careers that you should apply to your dating life:
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
I’m a grown up, but I continually ask myself where I want to be later in life? Am I satisfied with my career? What kind of career would fulfill me? What kind of career would I want to wake up and do everyday so that it doesn’t feel like a job?
When it comes to your relationships, you should be asking yourself the same things. What kind of relationship do you want to be in long term? Are you satisfied with your relationship now, or the ones you’ve had in the past? What kind of relationship would fulfill you and make you happy, so that you can actively be involved every day and it won’t feel like a chore?
DOES YOUR PATH REQUIRE EDUCATION?
I personally didn’t get my higher education, but I picked a career that constantly evolved and required me to learn something new everyday.
Why wouldn’t I take the same approach with my relationships? Learning to communicate better, learning how to love myself, receiving coaching or counseling to help me get past my hurdles are all a part of the education you need to succeed at relationships.
DO YOU SET GOALS AND PLAN TO SUCCEED?
Our calendars are filled with work meetings and networking opportunities. We set clear goals for our careers and put together plans. Business plans, marketing plans, financial plans. We plan to succeed and we execute on those plans.
Do you have a plan for your relationship? Do you set goals with your partners? If you set time in your calendar, and put together goals and a plan to succeed at your relationship, you may be more inclined to work at it, and therefor have a higher chance at success.
DO YOU CELEBRATE YOUR SUCCESS?
I just got one of my articles published by a large site last week. It was a huge accomplishment as a writer and I automatically wanted to go and celebrate that win. We go to fancy dinners when we get that promotion, and get really excited about our boss telling us we did something well, but are we getting this excited and celebrating the accomplishments of our relationship?
It’s important to celebrate and acknowledge each other on in our relationships. We should be able to express our feelings and give that pat on the back when someone is doing something right, since we’re so often quick to jump down their throat when they’re doing wrong.
Everything worth having takes hard work. As a society we seem to understand that hard work pays off when it comes to our careers, but refuse to accept that relationships take time and effort as well. There’s nothing easy about building a long, sustainable and fulfilling relationship. Maybe if we approached our relationships with half the tenacity as we do our careers, we’d all be more successful at love.