We were watching a movie and a man went down on a woman. When it was her turn to return the favor, she turned the other way and went to sleep. Her actions lead to an argument in the film, and to a conversation about reciprocity on my couch.
the practice of exchanging things with others for mutual benefit, especially privileges granted by one country or organization to another.
While giving and receiving in the bedroom is important, I believe that reciprocity in the rest of our relationship is what will make for a healthier one long term. How can you reciprocate in the rest of your relationship? Acknowledge, appreciate, compliment, thank or exchange actions and efforts your partner has made. Help clean up after they cook. Don’t turn away when they give you that hug. Listen to them as intently as they listen to you. Do something nice for them first.
People get comfortable and into our routines so we hold out on our affection and positive attention for when we feel like giving it. Instead we should be generous with our affection. We should give first and reciprocate our partner’s affection anytime it shows up, even when you’re tired and not as interested.
In most relationships, there’s a giver and a receiver. Things go wrong when the receiver does not reciprocate and the giver feels used, ignored, and unsatisfied in the relationship. Reciprocity is about creating a balance of giving and receiving in your relationship so that both parties feel valued.
How are you giving and reciprocating in your relationship?