25 Apr 2014

Don’t Have A Bad First Date Ever Again

Let’s start this post with a really bold statement. A bad date (first, second or last) has more to do with YOU than it has to do with your date.

During this journey I haven’t had a single “bad” date, and 96% of the men I went out with asked me out on a second date. Based on the stories I hear from both men and women, this is a rare statistical outcome.

I’m not the prettiest girl in the world or the most interesting person ever, but I got results because I did the following things:

  1. No Expectation, No Disappointments.
    I never entered the date with an expectation. Most women have this vision of what a good date is. What the man will look like, how he will act, and what he will say. To me this never mattered. I knew that each experience was going to help me figure out my own shit, and if he turned out to be great, that was a bonus.
  2. Have A Game Plan.
    Don’t expect the man to carry the date and conversation. Have your own stories to tell and things that you are looking to share that showcase what you’re looking for. Be prepared to listen and answer questions through conversations. This is not an interview. This is a conversation that takes both parties to participate.
  3. Practice The Gift Of Gab.
    Sometimes your date turns out to be a dud and can’t hold a conversation. This is what I call a therapy date. This is your chance to take over. I personally love these dates. I work from home and don’t get to interact with a lot of people everyday. These dates are an opportunity for me to just say whatever I want without much consequence because I know I will likely not see this man again. At the end I got to vent about some things, and is therefore still considered a success for me.
  4. Smile, Smile And Smile Some More.
    A lot of the time, men are reacting to your demeanor. If he didn’t look like you expected him to, don’t you dare get sour faced. Instead you SMILE! Smiling is inviting and friendly and as long as you stay inviting and friendly he won’t turn into a complete asshole.

Execute on the above tips and just be open to learning something new about someone else or yourself. You never know; he can be a great networking contact, or you can have a hobby in common that you needed a partner for.

What do you consider to be a bad date? Tell us in the comments section.

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