30 Mar 2015

3 Subtle Mistakes That Are Ruining Your Dating Life

You’ve been plowing through the dating field for a while. For so long that you feel like you’re an expert. After all, you go on plenty of dates and you get lots of attention from the opposite sex, but none of these dates turn into a relationship.

You may have perfected your online dating profile, and your two-minute first impression, but check below to see if you are making these subtle, yet crucial mistakes that are harder to recognize.

1. You Have No Clear Intent

You don’t have a clear sense of what you want and that’s making you cast your net pretty wide. So wide, that in fact that you’re confused about your intent to date in the first place. I’m all for dating around to figure out what you like, but while you’re at this experimental dating phase, you can’t expect much to come of it.

You wouldn’t get into a relationship with just anyone would you? So why would you date just anyone? It’s not until you are clear about what you’re looking for in a partner and your relationship that you’ll be able to see it in front of you.


2. You Have The Wrong Perspective

Maybe you’re clear about what you want, but are you more concerned about what this person can do for you? Are you here to see if this person can check things off of a list?

The error you could be making in your dates is focusing too much on yourself and not in the good way. You are more concerned about your needs, when you should be concerned about what you bring to the table. Why would someone want to be with you? What do you have to offer?

When you change your perspective to how you can serve others, others will start to serve you. – and don’t take this is a submissive quote, anytime you want to universe to do something for you, you must first be concerned about giving to the universe.


3. You Are Setting A Negative Tone

You’ve been at this dating thing for so long with no success that you come off as bitter, or you feel like you deserve more. Maybe you’re not as confident as you were when you started your search for love and in your recent encounters it shows in your tone.

It’s time to do a negativity scan. Scan your online dating profile, and scan yourself for how what you say to others but most importantly to yourself. Are there negative terms that you often rely on, like “I don’t know if I’ll ever find the one”, or “maybe something is wrong with me?”

Are you self-loathing, or rehashing bad dates (also known as complaining) about your dating life with new dates?


If you’ve tried something over and over again and it doesn’t seem to be working, it’s time to reevaluate and you have to start with yourself. Ask yourself if you are making the above mistakes and take the steps necessary to reinvigorate your dating life with a clear intent, a giving perspective and a positive attitude.

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